Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Serious stuff again!

Firstly, let me say, what the time and place and etcetera are. 6 am. Home. Just watched The Bucket List. Beautiful movie. Can't afford to do anything else now. I need to ponder over a movie after watching it, when it's too good. This is the third movie I watched in arow, preceeded by Ace Ventura and The Shining. The movie period was preceeded by a sour moment with Dad, with him having no clue, that it was sour, for me. The movie period is followed by Soham Talukdar's latest post on his blog. If, I detach myself from it, okay...I like it, I appreciate it, I appreciate it always when people add the "personal touch" to their publications. If, I terminate the detachment, well, the same thing that made the moment with Dad sour, is there, I mean his post. I dunno if it's time yet to go public about it. I have, once mentioned in a post about it. In a list of psychological disorders I suffer from. But this one disorder is different from others. It's like people refuse to identify you as what you believe you are. Anyway, I'll talk about it, someday, maybe today. But not now. So, here I just "re-post" the comment that I typed to one of my posts a short while ago. It would be more noticeable here.

"This comment is not supposed to be a comment. This will be re-posted elsewhere, I hope. Dear Soham, it's okay for you, who has hardly spent even a whole single hour with me, to misinterpret ME. So, I must mention, that I bear no "grudges" against you. But yeah, when I read your post, it infuriated me. Till I realised that, dammit, it's Soham Talukdar, someone I don't even care about; I shouldn't expect him to understand me, of all people! Anyway, self-issues apart, let's come to the "piece of poetry". The poem, Farewell, was, as mentioned, supposed to a "tribute" to the NIT life, not a criticism. Whatever I wrote , whatever, I "highlighted" was done in a note of appreciation. The last two lines of each stanza are meant to EMPHASISE that: the fact that I'm appreciating that kinda life, NOT criticising it. Secondly, I'm a heavy drinker and a chain smoker myself, I love getting "intoxicated". I hate people who hate the idea of getting intoxicated. Period. Thirdly, there were lines in my poem, as I believe, that were specifically designed to show the lucrative-ness of the careless lifestyle. The one that I live, and only the people at NIT, as I know, live. I find it lucrative. I blame my "poetic skills" if my words betrayed my feelings! Fourthly, I have interacted with a few NITians, quite closely (both physically and psychologically); I know that beyond all the carefree attitude they show, they have thinking, feeling, pain-responsive" souls. The person who asked me to write the poem, is one of them. Fifthly, if there are still complaints about how I portrayed NIT life, I must remind that I just converted prose to poetry, the matter was all typed and sent to me by the person who wanted it. I have no complaints against NITians or the NIT hostel. Lastly, about referring to me as "she", I don't want to talk about it. Not in this already-too-large comment. Apologies to Soham, for my unexplained outburst. I request you not to react to it, or rather not to really "read" it all! I sound confused, and I am."

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