Again!

Yeah, again! Now I know why Rupam keeps singing the same stuff; and Coelho keeps writing the same stuff. If I was professional, I would have turned up with similar stuff over and over again during this phase. I dunno what makes me sour now. Let's find out. A challenging afternoon, one that tested my self-control to its limits, so much so, that finally, my tears became shameless! Then a troubling nap for less than hour. A failed effort to cook up something. Yeah, to cheer my self up, I tried making an egg-roll. Fast food is always an uplifter. For mood, for weight, alike. Anyway, I discovered that my stupid "home" has a "stupider" kitchen. No white oil. I used a combination of Mustard oil and Butter, in an 1:2 ratio. Then, I discovered that there's no vegetable, no curry, to use inside the 'roll'. I used raw onion. Yeah, Tiyash is right, I finally agree. Raw onion doesn't taste well in kathi-rolls. I should have fried it. Then I discovered that there's no ketchup. I remembered having finished the KFC pouches a week ago. The thing I finally 'manufactured' with the minimal raw material available, wasn't tasty enough to lift up a depressed mood. I made coffee. That was wonderful. In fact, the best coffee I tasted in a year! (the previous being prepared by my mother, on one of my pre-CBSE days!)

I SMSed randomly. Few replies came. Anyway, why should, anyone at all, have time for me? The last SMS I sent was "Thanks for your time. I hope I can study NOW." 

I studied a couple of pages, and finished the chapter on Secondary Storage. I decided that I have read enough of Computer Science. I can glance through the remaining 70% on the night before the exam. Mathematics deserves more time than I'm allotting for it. But before I sit down with Maths, I think I ought to pack my bags for tomorrow. I've got to take all the winter clothes back to Durgapur. In any case, I don't think I'm going to Bhutan on my own, before I pass college. So, there's no point in keeping the warm clothes here in my already over-stuffed room anymore. Whatsoever, before I start packing, I thought I'd make a short post about the eventless evening.

Anyway, I never told anyone of the experience I had on the way back from the Book Fair. It was the first time I had stood at the foot of the door on a bus. Only my feet, and my hands were inside the bus. The rest of me, alongwith my bag, was dangling outside. The ladies in the cabin were expressing their alarm. But, I was thrilled. Life had seemed to be devoid any trouble, then. The rush of wind on my face, brushing through my hair, slapping my eye-lids close, gave me a feeling what I best describe as momentary euphoria. Momentary, because, it was erstwhile, like every happy moment is. No sooner had I smiled to myself, than, the 'face' of my dreams, my nightmares, my reality, came back to memory. I was upset again. But, anyway, shoving aside the issue of 'happiness', the feeling of 'thrill' persisted, till the crowds thinned and I had to shift to the gloomy interior of the bus. But, that was after the bus had reached Ballygunj. From E.M. Bypass to Ballygunj, I was a wingless bird. Just felt like doing so a while ago today. Riding on the footstand of a speeding bus...