She went offline. I'm back here. I just realised what I told Picco today afternoon. I'm bored. For the first time in 19 years, I admit, I am bored. I used to pride myself on the belief that I am the only person I know who can never get bored, because I can make things happen. I can. But now, all I've gotta do is wait. And waiting...well, this time, it's more trying. This is going to be the most difficult thing. More difficult that standing at Tollygunj from 3pm-6pm on a summer evening. More difficult than telling your ex-girl-friend's new boy-friend what to do, and when to do. This is worse, this is more difficult. And while I'me facing it, (and not evading it) I am bored. I tried studying yesterday. I changed subjects till I gave up. I found all taht boring. I watched movies at night, but I remember, I know how often I controlled the temptation to turn the computer off. I found the goodness in Mumbai Meri Jaan boring. I found the emotional scenes unworthy of going through. I found the scary happenings in The Uninvited unworthy of my fear. The only reason I watched the movies was to keep myself awake till 7:30am, for some noble purpose. I was bored of sleeping after that. I was bored of trying tomend my computer. I didn't go to watch the movies I had planned to, because the idea of watching them felt boring. I re-watched Inglorious Basterds with Picco n Dadabhai. That felt refreshing, though. After that, I skipped going to meet a friend to collect my long-ago-lent books. The idea of going out felt boring. But, that's not really important. Typing this feels boring. Or rather, worthless. But at least I'm doing something. If I didn't watch Inglorious Basterds, maybe I would have gone to collect the books, and watched an evening show as well. I need to do what I should do. I need to keep doing something or the other. So I will. The thought of being idle isn't too lucrative too!
Farmville now. Will drop by again later tonight. Doing for the sake of doing it.
Hospitals and banks: the way things work
1 week ago