Saturday, December 12, 2009

The Hangover

My health is going no good. No food for 48 hours, and yet an upset stomach. I've wanting to write here day before yesterday. But people kept calling for hours, till I was sleepy, and the blog had to be skipped. Then, after all the things on board have been destroyed by the storm, I got a view of an island to go to and anchor on. I set off towards it, and I fell asleep. When I woke up, it was too late. I missed the only opportunity I had in days, and I might have at all, in more days to come.
Yesterday, met Diptyajit (will refer to him as DJ henceforth) after a long time. After a lot of silent wondering on how to talk about "it", he informed me that had been reading my blog, so he has an idea. Inevitably, I got drunk. I didn't misbehave like the previous day (not my previous getting drunk, but my previous getting drunk with DJ, but I did forget my "rules" when I got a call. She missed it. She could have got everything out then, if she wasn't disgusted with my being drunk. But, it's good. I would have felt worse off, if I had let everything out, not getting anything back in return! Anyway, DJ switched off my cell, and hid it, and left a note on my desktop, in case I don't find it after I wake up. I remember hugging him like I did Aditi Aunty on 5th December. It's the kind of hug, which you give someone stronger than you, your hands tight on his/her shoulder, your head firm on his/her chest or shoulder (varies with the person's height) and you using all your energy to squeeze out tears. I don't remember anything much, though. I see the need bookmark on my browser, and remember, slowly, all the discussions about his life, that we had. He had left by 6pm, I had dropped dead within half an hour from then. I didn't throw up, which means I could have had more. I woke up at 11pm and had a pleasant hangover. I was my sarcastic smirking self again, only with a bit more intensity! Stayed awake till 3am, and my head was clear by then. Then I forced myself to go to sleep. I had a lot of dreams. I remember two of them distinctly. They were too good to be true. Absurdly real dreams. Had people like Hamza (a classmate) and Yealeena (an ex-classmate) in the roles of villains in the dream. But, I won, in the end. The second dream was even more real. It was about waking up, and calling her up, and hearing a freaked out voice, actually breaking good news to me. When I did wake up, after that, I had trouble understanding why her name didn't appear on the top of the call lists. I woke up at 5:30am. It's 7am now, and I've been having an awful nausea since I woke up. I also realized what has been troubling my mouth slightly till yesterday. It's a recurrence of what had happened many months ago. An infection in the corner upper jaw gum. I'll go to Disha's place today, I think. Oh, she lost her wallet again! Anyway, I've got everything out. And wonder why I didn't erase her from all it, like I have been swearing to do, in the last few posts. Am I still having a hangover? Absurd!

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