My health is going no good. No food for 48 hours, and yet an upset stomach. I've wanting to write here day before yesterday. But people kept calling for hours, till I was sleepy, and the blog had to be skipped. Then, after all the things on board have been destroyed by the storm, I got a view of an island to go to and anchor on. I set off towards it, and I fell asleep. When I woke up, it was too late. I missed the only opportunity I had in days, and I might have at all, in more days to come.
Yesterday, met Diptyajit (will refer to him as DJ henceforth) after a long time. After a lot of silent wondering on how to talk about "it", he informed me that had been reading my blog, so he has an idea. Inevitably, I got drunk. I didn't misbehave like the previous day (not my previous getting drunk, but my previous getting drunk with DJ, but I did forget my "rules" when I got a call. She missed it. She could have got everything out then, if she wasn't disgusted with my being drunk. But, it's good. I would have felt worse off, if I had let everything out, not getting anything back in return! Anyway, DJ switched off my cell, and hid it, and left a note on my desktop, in case I don't find it after I wake up. I remember hugging him like I did Aditi Aunty on 5th December. It's the kind of hug, which you give someone stronger than you, your hands tight on his/her shoulder, your head firm on his/her chest or shoulder (varies with the person's height) and you using all your energy to squeeze out tears. I don't remember anything much, though. I see the need bookmark on my browser, and remember, slowly, all the discussions about his life, that we had. He had left by 6pm, I had dropped dead within half an hour from then. I didn't throw up, which means I could have had more. I woke up at 11pm and had a pleasant hangover. I was my sarcastic smirking self again, only with a bit more intensity! Stayed awake till 3am, and my head was clear by then. Then I forced myself to go to sleep. I had a lot of dreams. I remember two of them distinctly. They were too good to be true. Absurdly real dreams. Had people like Hamza (a classmate) and Yealeena (an ex-classmate) in the roles of villains in the dream. But, I won, in the end. The second dream was even more real. It was about waking up, and calling her up, and hearing a freaked out voice, actually breaking good news to me. When I did wake up, after that, I had trouble understanding why her name didn't appear on the top of the call lists. I woke up at 5:30am. It's 7am now, and I've been having an awful nausea since I woke up. I also realized what has been troubling my mouth slightly till yesterday. It's a recurrence of what had happened many months ago. An infection in the corner upper jaw gum. I'll go to Disha's place today, I think. Oh, she lost her wallet again! Anyway, I've got everything out. And wonder why I didn't erase her from all it, like I have been swearing to do, in the last few posts. Am I still having a hangover? Absurd!
My daughter and Brigadier Gerard
10 hours ago